Old Clothes

I just finished the course I am taking,"Living the Questions". The teachers of the course are my dear friends and the direction of this series was to look at what we believe and more or less question. I have thought of myself over the last year as a progressive, and these friends were the same.

However in the course of lectures, I was uneasy. There were comments about "those folks" that believe in rapture, once saved always saved, literal heaven and hell, creation. They were snidely made and we even laughed at their expense. But it was like being in a crowd of people, picking on a kid with thick glasses and acne and you know you are just one set of contacts and a dermatology appointment from that guy. You are not him anymore, but you don't want him picked on. You have literally been in his shoes.

Several folks in the class mentioned these same feelings to me, afterwards, and I started to think about it. I don't want to go back to the way I believed before, but I don't want to be classified with the other side. A new, more progressive group. I finally realized, I don't want to be on a side. I want to be me.

Kind of like wearing a suit of clothes and they no longer fit. So you change into something more comfortable. And then they grow too short, so you strip and put on another set. This is right. For awhile. And then you change again. The process continues again and again. And then one day, you notice a picture of someone wearing the stupidest set of clothes you have ever seen and you realize you are looking at an old picture of yourself. And you wonder how in the world you could have ever thought that was fashionable or right. And then suddenly, you look down and realize in a few years you will be looking at a picture of yourself with the clothes you are wearing and you will think the same thing.

I don't want to wear another set of beliefs. I don't want to make fun at the other guy - the old me. I don't want to be identified with any sect, tribe, or belief system. I am slowly seeing that I am a free thinker and that God really likes that in me. I can wear or not wear whatever I want,it doesn't have to own me. I realize in my heart of hearts, I really want to be naked so He can clothe me. With Himself. So that when I look in the mirror, all I see is Him in me.

Ahhhhhhh......