Letting Go or Letting In

Grace..

That elusive, indescribable something. A gift, unmerited favor - no matter what you call it, everyone has a different perception of what it is. The ordinary blessings (whatever that means) in life - breath, light, food, shelter. Or maybe forgiveness - not asked for or even expected. Maybe the answers to prayer - when what we pray for coincides with what happens to us.

The parable of the Prodigal Son is one of my favorites. It is one of those scriptures that grows with you. In each stage of living, I have seen it from each character's perspective. As the child, I saw the generosity of the parent. As an obedient adult, I took the older brother's side. As a doting grandparent, I have seen the Father's view.

But today as I read it once more, it dawned on me the grace may not have been in the receiving of the wayward son home, but in the letting him go. In giving him what he asked for, knowing full well the trouble he would buy, the pain he would suffer, the humiliation and deprivation that might come. But doing it anyway. Not sure if he would ever return, much less escape unscathed - emotionally, spiritually, or even physically.

My generation, in parenting, put our children at the center of our lives. As such, we have created self-centered children. Tough love is a tough lesson many of us do not want to learn. But learning it, some of us are. Loving enough to let go, to cut off, to kick out. And it is the hardest thing we have ever done. But it is one of the greatest acts of love we may ever perform.

Is it in living, not in the favors, but the hurdles that are the blessings? The times He does not rescue me, but allows me to tread water. Even sink? Unmerited favor could very well be unwanted favor as well. The favor unwanted, because I do not look deeper than the surface. To see the Jewel shimmering just below the surface.

Wow, how much of my life becomes "on". Not waiting for the next encounter or next answer to prayer or the next retreat or the next stirring message. But every moment of the day - living, inhaling, exhaling the Living Lord. A God who lets me go and receives me home. Because that is the only way I will find Him.

Ahhhhh.....that is Grace