Pregnant?

Amidst the scurry and flurry of the holiday rush, I had to deal with a questionable report on my yearly check-up. After a series of further testing, it culminated in a "procedure", a very inocuous word for something quite painful.

At the end, I found myself in an ultrasound room, waiting for my specialist. While waiting, I happened to glance at the screen to my left and saw the black and white outline of a fetus. Now the test had not begun, so I knew this was not my uterus on the screen, but for a split second, I had rather a shock. Images started flashing before my eyes of what it might be like to receive that news. You are pregnant! Diapers, baby food, and assorted baby things kept popping in and out of my mind.

The doctor entered the room shortly thereafter and I had gathered my wits enough to jokingly inquire about the monitor. He sheepishly told me that most women having ultrasounds in this room were indeed pregnant, so the reason for the picture. I joked with him, but deep inside I was a bit unsettled. Of course, I did not want a baby in this season of my life, but the very fact that I could not, was a little sad.

Since my focus has been on Mary this Christmas season, I could not help but think of her. Of course, she did not have the benefit of ultrasound, but the slow rounding of her abdomen, the cessation of her menses - all the signs were there. I also thought of Elizabeth. Not unlike myself, in the fact that we were both past our childbearing years, but the evidence was there for her as well. The swelling abdomen and tenderness of her breasts, both signs of something once felt dead, now miraculously alive.

Between the two women, there were a myriad of feelings. Shock, joy, shame, peace, pain. Repeated over and over in their lifetimes as they nurtured, loved, and then watched as their sons followed the paths God had sent them to take. More food for thought. I will get back with you.

Alleluia!