The Finger of God

My husband was very ill for about a year and required home nursing, three times a week. One of the nurses we had was a wonderful lady who had converted from the Episcopal faith to Buddhism. I am ever thankful for that year of getting to know her and what I learned not only about her faith but the beautiful spiritual discipline of meditation. One day as I sat beside her working, I am not sure even now how it happened, our conversation drifted to why she had converted. She said that she just came to a point where she could no longer believe in a God that would crucify His Son so that He might be reconciled with His creation. I will never forget that explanation and the questions it raised for me.


In the scripture reading for this Sunday in 1 John 4:7-21, that question is again broached and answered, in what I feel, is the only way it can be. God is love, not hate. He did not murder His Son, He sacrificed His Son for us. As I read those words, I thought of Micheangelo’s Creation of Adam, the beautiful painting found on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, and the isolated portion of the painting so often reproduced. The arms and hands of God and Adam reaching out to touch. In this case, though, I saw my arm, my finger poised toward God’s. As I struggled toward God, I suddenly felt a hand on my wrist. Looking up I saw it was Christ helping me to reach Him. Just before He guided my finger to His Father’s, Christ placed my finger into the nail rent of His other hand. I was shocked and I wanted to pull back, but He continued to guide me to God and the Father and I touched through that gruesome wound. Isn’t that just awful? But isn’t it so terribly powerful!

In the beginning, God initiatated the sacrificial system with Abraham, even to the point that He instructed Abraham to sacrifice his only living son on an altar in an act of worship. Of course, God stopped him before that happened, but the foreshadowing was powerful. This system of worship was common to the peoples of that time, even child sacrifice, and He continued to use that as the venue for Abraham’s worship of Him, using various animals. Throughout the history of the Jewish people, this type of worship was instituted and followed. Then when Jesus came to the point where He would make the supreme sacrifice, God’s only Son went as a lamb to the slaughter. His demeanor before Pilate was the best picture He could possibly give us of that sacrificial lamb. Then to be executed by the current Roman means of punishing criminals for their sins, was like putting one of those strobe lighted arrows to the glaring fact that He died for OUR SINS!!! Wow!

But back to my visual. As I sat there dumbstruck of the very means Christ used to join me to God, I looked up at His face. But it was no longer Jesus I saw, but the face of Michangelo’s God. And in that face of God I saw the most unbelievable mixture of love and pain. Tears coursing down His face as He looked into my eyes. And a tinge of hope, hope that I would understand just how very much He loves me.

I hope I never forget that feeling. I hope I never forget that face. I hope that in my heart of hearts, I spend the rest of my life not trying be worthy of it or earn it– that would be the greatest waste of my time - but to feel it, and glory in it, and live through it. To reach out to my brothers and sisters in my own feeble way.

I wish I could see that nurse again. In light of the gift she gave our family, I would thank her again, from my heart, for the wonderful care she gave my husband. In light of the gift she gave me in that explanation, I would thank her for that question. Then I would try, somehow, with the very limits of my language to express that God did not crucify His Son. Love did! Love did and hopefully it is doing the same each and every day in my life and the lives of those I call my family in Christ.

Not Everyone Is a Rocket Scientist!

Not everyone is a rocket scientist!                   
One of my favorite shows is the Big Bang Theory. I love it because it laughs at itself and enjoys doing it. I think we go through life seeing everyone one dimensionally. I think therefore I am. Well, it is more like I think therefore I think you think the same way I do. Well, folks, not everyone is a rocket scientist. Not everyone is a moron. And believe it or not, not everyone is you.

We know by basic scientific knowledge, that there are levels of human intelligence. Likewise, there are levels of human physical and mental capabilities. Add heredity and nurture and then throw in our cultural and ethnic differences and we might as well be all walking aliens.

What I am getting at, is why do we get frustrated with folks when they cannot comprehend or behave as I do. Why do I view them in light of what I know, what I have experienced, or what I perceive. How silly of me and what a terrible waste of my emotions to vent about persons or situations beyond their scope or area of credence.

Now, what about our faith. Why is it we find ourselves clucking our tongues and shaking our heads over a world that is gone to the dogs. As a spirit filled, Christ centered, child of God I see the world in one way. But a person who does not have the center, that has never experienced the overwhelming, grace endowing, burst at the seams love of a God who values them above His only Son, how can they possible think, act, and react like I do. They cannot! And my grousing and complaining and blaming is a total waste of the time God has allotted me on this earth. If I ever want to make my world a better place, I better get in the habit of spreading His love around. Of sharing heavenly glimpses of hope and joy and grace to a world needing it like a parched ground.

Shut up and show off – that is my new motto!

Days - Old but Good?

Equality – the American way. Except in high school!      

                                                                                                         

Don’t know about you, but when I graduated high school 40 years ago this month, there was a caste system. It was not delineated as peasants and nobility, but it was there just the same. The jocks, the drill team, the choir, the band, the academics (nerds).

Each had its pecking order. I had my foot in a little of several so I was able to migrate between the groups. More identifiable with some than others.

This past weekend, I had my 40th high school reunion. It was very interesting. We have several folks that have diligently kept the class together and had a good turn out. I have not kept up with everyone, so I was more or less on the fringe. But I did not mind, because I am a people watcher and I had the best seat in the house. Of course, everyone was really old. HaHa! It is funny how we are old as we look, not think. I am a 16 year old trapped in an old body! I looked better than some, worse than others. It was funny seeing folks and how they moved through the room.

One guy caught my eye. I didn’t know him well, but he did not run in the popular groups. In fact he was more or less a loner. But I saw him in the midst of a great group of friends and he seemed to be having the time of my life. I thought my eyes might be deceiving me, but when I got close, it was the same guy. I asked my husband about him and found out in high school this guy had more or less been a tag along. People were nice to him.

But this was not the same. He was smack dab in the middle of the fun and inside, I was a bit jealous. I realized that time had taken a toll on more than our bodies. Our caste system had mellowed to the point that it was not even visible. It was a level playing field. Those above had bent down and those below had reached up. The lowly not worried about being snubbed or ridiculed. The elevated not worried about their reputation or impression. We had all decided to play fair and share. Something we were taught in kindergarten and somehow lost along the way.

But you know what? This goes a lot farther than high school, or work, or even play. It goes to the heart of being a Christian. We see the least, the last, the lost as unfortunate souls that are below us. That we must reach down and offer ourselves to. But what of those above us. I realized that those that rely on wealth or fame or beauty can very well be in the same category. There will come a time when either age or trials or illness will strike and when they do, unless there is a unperishable foundation built, they can be as least and lost as it gets.

So when we spread our reach, let’s remember to reach up and down.

Love Is Not Smart

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes,
always perseveres.


Reading this is like taking a trip down a path. It is sunny, but the trees shade your path. The birds are singing, you are smiling, all is right with the world. La-de-da-de-da! Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast. On and on, good words, honorable words, true words. But you get to verse 7 and it is like you are hitting some rocking road. Love ALWAYS protects, ALWAYS trusts, ALWAYS hopes, ALWAYS perseveres???? Wait a minute!! What if the object is not worth my protection? What if the person is not trustworthy? What if the situation is hopeless? What if every ounce of my being is screaming for resolution, but none is found??? The birds have stopped singing, the clouds are forming, and the world is suddenly not right at all.


Love is not very smart if it puts itself out there to be abused. It is not very savvy if it puts all its eggs in one basket just to see them dropped and broken. It is surely not wise if it hopes in someone who is a hopeless cause. Surely it cannot go on when there is nothing and no one to go on with.

But you see, God is just that. If there was a picture next to love it would by God or the physical incarnation of him, Christ our Lord. God always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Okay, I am feeling better now. He has the shoulders to bear under that. He is able to do all those superhuman things.

But my teeter totter has not finished rocking. If my prayer is to grow into His likeness, and it is, then this is me too. Not the perfect form of Love, but shouldn’t I have the ever increasing desire to be all this? How do I do that? I am in a pickle. There are folks in my life that I cannot trust, they have hurt me. There are folks so vulnerable, I do not have enough energy or resources within me to protect them. There are things going on in my life that are trying to snuff out the candle of hope burning in me. And, God knows (literally) that my perseverance tank is running mighty low. So how do I do it?

Is it that in every human being there is a spark of the divine? No matter if they have acknowledged it, no matter if they have denied it. And the love of me, as it grows reaches out, seeks them out and somehow connects in a way that I might not even be aware of. As I grow in Him, do I just do that? Grow In Him! I hope so, I really do….

Bars and Chains

The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me,

Because the LORD has anointed me
To bring good news to the afflicted;
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to captives
And freedom to prisoners


Isaiah 61:1






Early, this past Sunday morning, as I sat in my empty sanctuary, I could almost picture the people that would fill the pews. As I did, these words of scripture came to mind.


Later as I looked over the congregation from the choir loft, I saw the reality in the faces looking back at me. Had I not been prepared, I would have been picking out the “two-fers”. Those who darken the door of a church only on Easter and Christmas. Before that scripture, I would have hoped they received something from the worship experience. Something that would bring them back or, even better, walk them down the aisle to profess their faith.


But now as I saw their faces, I saw something else. I saw captives and prisoners. Not just in those unknown faces, but also in the familiar faces of my family of faith. It dawned on me that so many of us in that room were being held captive and we did not even realize it. The bars were ones that so many of us shared, they were almost invisible. Cells of addiction to work or play. Prisoners to ill health and financial woes. Bindings of greed, anger, lust, and guilt were so entwined, freedom was barely a distant memory.


Hope was the message preached this past Sunday and it is the message the world of today is dying to hear. Hope in a freedom that seems so elusive. A freedom that must be desired before it can be realized.

As it was proclaimed in our worship, I realized the actual “setting free”was not in a number on our rolls, a trip down the aisle, or even tears on a cheek. It was the ability of His Word to do a work in a heart. Unseen and often unnoticed. But inch by inch, link by link, chains could be removed and there was no knowing if this Easter Sunday was the day when the final link would be shattered or the prison door flung open.


Because, He does nothing without our permission or our agreement. And to make that decision, we must see the prison bars and have hope that it is possible to be set free. That is our mission and our call to preach.

Undeserved Love

Undeserved Love......

That is what the Easter message truly is.   God reaching down to a hurting, messed up, needy, sinful creation.  And in doing so,saying "You are my beloved".  And the proof was on the cross.

In thinking about this, I thought about who we love undeservedly.  We love our families but that is out of blood connection and somewhat duty.  We care for co-workers and friends.   But here again, in our busy lives we do not go too deep.  There is only so much time and energy left after our day or work and play that can be expended.  We seek to invest in those friends that are low maintenance.  Much as we choose the shrubs in our landscaping.  Friends that require little of our time and energy.  That we can pick up from time to time to enjoy.  That give as much as take.  That reciprocate our care and concern.  Needy, high maintenace folks are shunned or at least avoided.

But you see, that is not how Jesus worked.  He not only acknowledged the needy and lost, he invested in them.  He loved them and healed them.  I never thought about it, but I am sure many of those healed and fed were in the group of followers that followed Him from city to city.  Still needing to be near Him.  To see Him and touch Him.  Much like the woman with the issue of blood, I am sure these least of mankind drained power from His very essence.

So as I approach Good Friday and prepare to be confronted with His final act of benevolence, what am I to do with this over the top grace? How do I begin to emulate that in my life and my living? Where do I find the time to "love" as He did?  Who do I choose to invest in? What must I give up to do this? 

Lord, where do I even begin....

A Glimpse of Heaven

I enter this Holy Week with a great sadness.  A young couple I know has lost their 2 year-old little girl.  She had a congenital heart defect and was on the list to receive a new heart.  It just was not to be.

This great tragedy is compounded by the fact that her four year old brother died one year ago this month from the same ailment.  It was not even known at the time he had the condition until he collapsed at a sporting event and died subsequently.  

In praying for the young couple, I was at a loss for words.  What solace could there possibly be for the loss of 2 precious children?  How could someone ever get over something like that.  Even silence,  tears, and moans could do no justice to so great a tragedy.  But what came to me, in that expression to God, was a plea for heaven.  If the young couple could just see a glimpse of the place their children now lived.  If they could see the face of Jesus and the love He has for their babies.  The heavenly host who have so wrapped their love and their support around these two darlings - perhaps that would be of some comfort.

As the week has progressed, I thought of another parent.  How did God perceive this Holy Week we are traveling through?  How does a parent watch and wait for what He knows will unfold?  How can He know that He will literally sit on His hands and that His will is for His Son to do the same?  What pain and agony!  A torturous death that could in all actuality be avoided.  And for what?  A world that would scorn, scoff and curse His name not only in that moment but for thousands of years to come? 

Was that glimpse of heaven what sustained them?  Did God realize in a few short days, His Son would be released from the earthly bonds He had submitted Him to thirty three years prior.  Was He picturing Jesus once again joining Him, sitting at His right hand, ruling with Him over heaven and earth?

And was the fact that this one act of sacrifice on the parts of them both, would open heaven's gates in a way that nothing else had, would, or could.  That the division between perfection and imperfection, sinner and saint, good and evil - all would be bridged by the very act of their mutual suffering and pain.  The same glimpse of heaven would become a reality for us all. 

I am sitting here loved, saved, and sanctified because They did!

Alleluia!!